Saint Beyoncé

Kathleen Posted by Kathleen at December 1, 2017 15:27:30 December 1, 2017 15:27:30

Our Queen is a generous person, a loving, giving, kind soul. She gives back in many ways, to many charitable organizations. This week, she granted the wish of a child in need. In case you were wondering WHY Beyoncé would lend her talents to a duet with Ed Sheeran, the answer is that it’s the season of selflessness and philanthropy and her generosity knows no limits. 

The remix to Ed Sheeran’s song Perfect, featuring Beyoncé, dropped yesterday and he’s already been asked HOW he managed to gain the benevolence of our Queen.

“I can’t believe it to be honest… It’s something I kinda did just to see whether should would say yes.”

It’s like when little kids write letters to Santa Claus crossing their fingers and wishing on stars that he’ll respond. I’m assuming Ed Sheeran is on the nice list this year because Beyoncé responded with a yes to a plaid shirt-wearing, guitar-playing, corny ginger child (no disrespect to all gingers, just this particular one) on a song that blatantly rips off one of his other songs. When I first heard the OG Perfect, I thought it was his other wedding-friendly ballad Thinking Out Loud. THEY ARE THE SAME SONG. Why is no one talking about this? Ed Sheeran should be on his knees thanking Beyoncé because she elevated this knockoff, cheeseball, throwaway track to a beautiful lullaby. 

Me listening to the Ed Sheeran solo version of Perfect: Ugh, this is so sappy and it’s trying so hard to be every basic bitch’s first dance song I can’t stand it.

Me listening to the Beyoncé version: This is a stunningly romantic story of true love and I hope it will be playing while I sway weeping in my future husband Michael Bae Jordan’s arms on our wedding day. 

I’ve now listened to the Perfect duet 4 times this morning. Every time Ed sings, “I don’t deserve this,” I say CORRECT, out loud. 

This isn’t the first time Ed Sheeran has been the recipient of Beyoncé’s kindness. In 2015, they performed together at Stevie Wonder’s Grammy tribute. That year, Ed also told Jimmy Fallon that he played third wheel to Bey and Jay on a pizza date after his show at Barclays. Then, they performed an acoustic version Drunk In Love together at the Global Citizen Festival.  I have spent two years refusing to watch this. Ed Sheeran’s stans will say that this duet happened because Ed and Bey are such great friends and she’s a fan of his work. Here’s how I think it went down: Ed Sheeran calls up Beyoncé
and asks her to be on the song. She has to put the phone down to ask Jay to remind her who this kid is. Blue Ivy calls from the other room, “it’s that redhead boy who never brushes his hair!” Beyoncé vaguely remembers. She finds it within her heart to donate her time and angelic voice to a mediocre melody. 

Christmas is 24 days away. Is this song proof that Beyoncé is a REALLY great gift giver? 

 

Photos:
Kevin Winter/ Getty Images

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